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“You made a promise last night in the dark. I’m making you one now. Never again. You’ll never be alone again. No matter how bad the nightmare gets, I’m going to be right here.”
Just know, speaking as someone who has been through it all… No matter how dark it gets, you will get through this night.
Sayfa 23Kitabı okudu
I trail off when I face my lotus flower and he's on one fucking knee.
What the...?
"That scene was our beginning, as unglamorous as it was. No matter how scared I was of you and everything you presented, I wouldn't have it any other way. You're the purest, most passionate soul I've ever met. You loved me when I didn't even like myself. You held me together when I was falling apart and helped me put myself back together one piece at a time until I became the man I am today." He reaches into his jacket and pulls out a dark-blue velvet box, then opens it to show two rings. "I love you more than words can describe and I'll be honored if you choose to spend the rest of your life with me so I can give back a fraction of what you've given me. Nikolai Sokolov, would you marry me—”
It is hard enough to accept that this is what the physical body amounts to. But what about a person’s anger? What about her voice? Her laughter? Her arrogance? Her irreverence? Her humor, her ego, her honor, her character? Do these fingerprints of an individual life simply evaporate and disappear with the last exhale? And if that is so, what use all this struggle, misery, and strife? What difference whether a woman ever lived or not? Whether she was loved or unloved, educated or illiterate, wanted or unwanted by her parents, whether or not she suffered hurt and betrayal, or whether she still managed to retain her humanity and nobility? In the end, Bhima thinks, it doesn’t matter. It is all ash and dust. This is what it means to be human, she thinks: grains of dust arranged in human form—some dark, some light, some tall, some short, some male, some female. And in the end, the same gust of wind breaks them all down.
Heart of Emptiness
It is in "The Emptiness Chapter" that I write down the Way of the martial arts of the Two-Sword style.
The heart of emptiness is in the absence of anything of form and the inability to have knowledge thereof. This I see as emptiness.
Emptiness, of coures, is nothingness. Knowing the existent, you know the nonexistent. This, exactly,
Book 5 - EmptinessKitabı okudu
“I left Abnegation because I wasn't selfless enough,no matter how hard I tried to be."
"That's not entirely true." He smiles at me. "That girl who let someone throw knives at her to spare a friend,who hit my dad with a belt to protect me-that selfless girl,that's not you?"
He's figured out more about me
“You will be the first test subject, Tobias. Beatrice, however...." She smiles. "You are too injured to be of much use to me, so your execution will occur at the conclusion of this meeting."
I try to hide the shudder that goes through me at the word "execution," my shoulder screaming with pain, and look up at Tobias. It's hard to blink tears back when I see the terror in Tobias's wide, dark eyes.
"No," says Tobias. His voice trembles, but his look stern as he shakes his head. "I would rather die."
"I'm afraid you don't have much of a choice in that matter," replies Jeanine lightly.
Tobias takes my face in this hands roughly and kisses me, the pressure of his lips pushing mine apart. I forget my pain and the terror of approaching death and for a moment, I am grateful that the memory of that kiss will be fresh in my mind as I meet my end.”
Until everything topples, we have no idea what we actually have, how precariously and perfectly it all hangs together.
I can't help thinking that we're more than the sum total of our choices, that all the paths we might have taken factor somehow into the math of our identity.