I love the dynamics of negotiation. Skillful negotiators, of which I am among the best, are forceful, persistent, perceptive and patient. I thrive on seeking out and defining my opponent's comfort zone, that imaginary box (…), and then placing an offer on the inside rim of that comfort zone closest to my own best interests. This delicate placement gives the doofus the absolute minimum he'll accept to close the deal and still be able to convince himself he won, that he really stuck it to me.
Negotiation is a poker game, played with fortunes at stake instead of chips. To win - and this is key - you must make the other guys think they want what you 've got more than you want what they've got. And, in Kenny Rogel's words, "You've got to know when to hold 'em, and know when to fold 'em."
Negotiation is the ultimate in power play. Knowledge of your foe is your most powerful weapon, of course, and I maintain a full-time private investigator on my staff for exactly this purpose. But control of the physical element of a negotiation is also crucial. From the moment you enter the room, you want as much accumulated power on your side of the table as possible. Accordingly, I have five ground rules for my people or myself entering a negotiation:
1. Suits required.
2. My place.
3. My contract: Always volunteer to draw up the contract. ‘I'll go ahead and have my people draw up the contract... its no problem.' It seems innocuous enough to offer the courtesy of handling this detail. But now everyone will be beginning with your contract, and the language your Dream Team lawyer has carefully, cleverly written to earn his equity. And you get a first and longer look at what it says and how it reads. You enter negotiations with the perfect instrument from your perspective, so the burden is on the other side to find and recognize terms, terminology and clauses not to their advantage.
4. Nobody leaves until the deal is done: You tell your counterparts in advance that you expect the deal to be signed at the end of the upcoming negotiation meeting, and for them to make whatever preparations required for a non-stop marathon. In fact, memo them to that effect. They'll agree, because from the comfort of their own offices, they can't envision the type of meeting you are already mentally preparing for.
5. Everyone necessary for a final, definitive decision must be present at the meeting - or there is no meeting.
With all the above ground rules met, the other team arrives at, say, 9 o'clock in the morning. You greet them with friendly formality, offer coffee, and escort them to where you want them to sit. Then you buzz your assistant and instruct that no one is accepting calls. You ask all present to turn off tgeir cell phone, iPods and other sources of interruption. You get up, go over to the conference room door, and lock it, saying:
‘I know this is as important for you as it is for us, so we don't want to be disturbed, do we?'
How can they disagree? At the same time, your message or memo about remaining in negotiations until the deal is consummated is starting to sink in. He means it.
You have to make some allowance for potty breaks. After all, you did give them coffee. That's why the conference rooms of high performance companies have adjoining restrooms. But the point is that you expect no one to leave. Not for another meeting, not for golf at three, not even for meals, which you thoughtfully order in. In handling the meeting in this way, you are exerting total power over these unsuspecting doofuses. Your place. Your contract. Your rules. (…) I am not a despot, but I don't mind being perceived as one in a negotiation with those starting with the usual "win-win" crap.
Have someone on your team record the proceedings, or at least take thorough notes, especially of the details of the deal as they're hammered out. At the end of negotiations, or even at the end of a lengthy session, have those notes typed and printed out in hard copies for the two chief negotiators. lt's amazing how people forget little negotiated points, especially concessions they've made in the heat of the moment. So memorialize your deal as your notes reflect it - and leave a little space at the bottom of each page for you and the other chief negotiator to initial. (…)
"But, Dan, what happens if they send you a contract later in which minor details have been changed?" Send it back. They're testing to see how your resolve weighs against your desire to get the deal done with no further delay. Send it back immediately. You might even attach a copy of the memo they initialed at the conference table, highlighting the item they've tried to renege on or "adjust." Don't let them weasel out on one percentage point, not one digit or dollar.
Sometimes, even your most adroit negotiating, your cleverest ploy, will not dislodge a position taken by your opponent. If you can't agree to the point in the deal, say so. 'This proposal is unacceptable to us as it stands. If you can’t work with us to solve the impasse, we'll have to break off negotiations.'
They'll call you on it, by replying something like, 'At this point in the proceedings, we're not prepared to compromise on this particular issue. But we can talk about it some more at a later date.'
So... without a word, you gather your papers, put them into your briefcase and slam your briefcase shut. Your associates mechanically do the same. Then you look at their senior man in the eye and say, "You can reach me through my office." You and your associates stand up and walk out. If you're in your own conference room, you've left the other side to scratch its head in disbelief and find its own way out, or be shown out by a secretary.
If the meeting happens to be in their offices, or their attorney's office (the worst place), it's even cleaner for you to execute your walk out. Just remember - when you get outside, keep walking - and never, NEVER look back. They're watching you from the windows. Then you disappear from their day, giving them time and space to reflect on their stupid intransigence. The point is, don't be afraid to walk out. A dramatic exit is a killer because it's always unexpected. (…)
By the way, never make an empty promise or an idle threat. Mean what you say, then do it without a blink - as if you've done it a thousand times. If you say you're going to walk, you'd better damn well walk no matter what. Or they'll never believe another word you utter again. Don't worry... you can always resurrect another day.
I'm not going to get into the nuts-and-bolts strategies of successful negotiating. Those books have already been written. My message is - learn to thrive in the conflict of negotiation. Know your foe, master your tactics, enjoy the poker game... and win! No matter what happens!
So... create a plan with no safety nets, no escape. Make sure Strategy drives Structure - not vice versa. Learn to thrive in conflict... and become a master poker player at the negotiating table.
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