'' Question for you, Neil. Do I look dead to you?" He pointed up at his face, waited for Neil to answer, and didn't seem surprised when Neil didn't. "Here."
Andrew beckoned Neil closer as if he wanted to show Neil something on his phone's small screen. He flipped the phone open one-handed and pressed down hard on a single button. There was silence, then the distant hum of Andrew's phone dialing out. Between them Neil's phone started to sing. The words were different than Andrew's ringtone, but the voice was the same. Neil knew it was from the same miserable song. The lyrics hurt just as much as Andrew's had. Neil stared down at the phone and let it ring.
"Your phone is ringing," Andrew said. "You should answer it."
Neil picked it up with numb fingers and opened it. He spared only a second to look at Andrew's name on the screen before he answered and put it to his ear.
"Your parents are dead, you are not fine, and nothing is going to be okay," Andrew said. "This is not news to you. But from now until May you are still Neil Josten and I am still the man who said he would keep you alive.
"I don't care if you use this phone tomorrow. I don't care if you never use it again. But you are going to keep it on you because one day you might need it." Andrew put a finger to the underside of Neil's chin and forced Neil's head up until they were looking at each other. "On that day you're not going to run. You're going to think about what I promised you and you're going to make the call. Tell me you understand."
The shimmer of pearls in Ezra’s hair caught my attention. I stared at the tiny, round gems. They were pretty, but I didn’t wear jewelry other than the gold chains that had once held my veil in place. No one had ever given me a piece—not a ring, necklace, hairpin, or bauble. I’d never purchased any for myself with whatever coins I’d found in my travels throughout the city, either. I never sought to own jewelry because I didn’t think it was meant for me. That sounded silly, but when Ezra or Mother wore such sparkly, beautiful things, they felt meant for them. Just as they did for nearly every female and many of the males in attendance tonight.
My mother’s head turned toward Ezra in response to something she’d said. The Queen smiled, and the breath I took was too thin. It was a beautiful smile, and I couldn’t remember her ever directing one like that at me.
She smiled at Ezra that way, but not me. Not her daughter.
I swallowed in hopes of easing the lump that had filled my throat, and all I succeeded in doing was nearly choking myself. My mother laughed, and I felt it in every bone. I had never made her laugh. Why would I? I was the failed Maiden, and Ezra was a Princess.
Gods, I was actually…jealous. After all these years. How could that even be possible? I wanted to laugh, but for the briefest of moments, I wanted to be Ezra.
I wanted to be the one sitting there, worthy of the family that surrounded me. Well, all but Tavius, but Ezra counted. And I wanted that.
SeraKitabı okudu
One Ring To Rule Them All
Hepsine hükmedecek Bir Yüzük, hepsini o bulacak
Hepsini bir araya getirip karanlıkta birbirine bağlayacak
one ring
Taşıması o kadar güç bir yük ki o kadar zor ki.
Imagine you’re a boxer, and on your first day in the ring you take one on your chin. It’s gonna hurt like fucking hell, but at year ten of being a boxer, you won’t be stopped by one punch. You’ll be able to absorb twelve rounds of getting beat the fuck down and come back the very next day and fight again. It’s not that the punch has lost power. Your opponents will be even stronger. The change has happened within your brain. You’ve calloused your mind.
I am too close . . .
I am too close for him to dream of me.
I don’t flutter over him, don’t flee him
beneath the roots of trees. I am too close.
The caught fish doesn’t sing with my voice.
The ring doesn’t roll from my finger.
I am too close. The great house is on fire
without me calling for help. Too close
for one of my hairs to turn into the rope
of the alarm bell.
