Guilt Treatment A: Learn the Recipe for an Effective Apology
Most of us conceive of apologies as including three basic ingredients: (1) a statement of regret for what happened; (2) a clear "I'm sorry" statement; and (3) a request for forgiveness -all of which must be delivered with sincerity. (...) Scientists have discovered three additional components that also play a vital role in an apology's effectiveness: validating the other person's feelings, offering atonement, and acknowledging we violated expectations.
How to Offer Authentic Emotional Validation
1-Let the other person complete his or her narrative about what happened so you have all the facts. 2-Convey your understanding of what happened to this person from his or her perspective (whether you agree with that perspective or not and even if that perspective is obviously skewed). 3-Convey your understanding of how the person felt as a result of what happened (from his or her perspective). 4-Acknowledge that his or her feelings are reasonable (which, given that person's perspective, they are). 5-Convey empathy and remorse for the person's emotional state.
Although it might not always be relevant, necessary, or possible to do so, making offers to compensate or atone for our actions in some way can be extremely meaningful to the offended party, even if he or she turns down the offers we make.
“I’m sorry.” His face darkened with sincerity. “I know I didn’t have a right to talk about you like a trophy to be won from your father. And I’m sorry for warning Mr. Hobson to keep his son away from you.” He smiled tightly. “I would say I did that for your benefit, but really, I did it for me.” His eyes fell on my chest. “I don’t do well with competition.”
Düşüş,Albert Camus'un bir romandan ziyade monolog niteliği taşıyan eseridir.Bu monologda avukat olan anlatıcımız(kahramanımız)tarafından Camus'un modern insanı ve modern insanın düşünce yapısı ve bir takım beşeri özellikleri sert ve yarı üstü kapalı biçimde eleştirdiğine tanık oluruz.Eleştirel yanı bir yana monolog diğer neredeyse tüm romanlarında da karşılaştığımız varoluşçuluğun izlerini de taşır.Aynı zamanda Camus anlatıcısına da yüklemiş olduğu tezat durumlar ve söylemler ile aktarımına farklı bir yorumlama getirir.Özellikle monolog da kullanmış olduğu çarpıcı cümleler ile de yapıtı fazlasıyla keskinleştirmiştir.
"Men are never convinced of your reasons, of your sincerity, of the seriousness of your sufferings, except by your death. So long as you are alive, your case is doubtful; you have a right only to their skepticism."