Sözler ve Alıntılar
“I should’ve let you freeze to death in Kent’s old apartment. I should’ve let those rodents devour your carefully preserved carcass. I should’ve—”
“Listen, man, I’m really not trying to—”
“Don’t interrupt me.”
My mouth snaps shut.
But sometimes I wonder—
What about me?
Why don’t my feelings matter? Other people get to experience a full range of emotions without judgment, but I can’t be anything but happy without making most people uncomfortable. Everyone is used to seeing me smiling, being goofy. I’m the fun guy, the easygoing guy. I’m the one everyone can count on for a good laugh. When I’m sad or pissed off no one knows what to do with me.
Nazeera.
So fucking beautiful, I think.
And then I’m gone.
Weightless.
The feeling sideswipes me so fast I can’t stop it in time. It grows quickly, spiraling out of control: sadness breeding sadness, self-pity circling me mercilessly. All my shitty experiences—every heartbreak, every disappointment— choose this minute to tear me open, dining out on my heart until there’s nothing left, until the grief eats me alive. I crumble under the weight of it.
“Denial is the first stage of grief, bro.”
“Fuck off, Sanchez.”
“She’s not coming,” Warner shouts. “Go away.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” I shout back. “I want to talk to Juliette. Ella. Jella. Jello. Whatever.”
“Ella, love, please—let me kill him.”
Sometimes I feel so alone in this world I can’t even breathe.