When Maven steps forward, the tension in the room deflates. He stutters briefly, tripping over the words he’s been taught, but he finds his voice. “Lady Mareena.”
Trying my best not to shake, I rise to my feet and face him.
“In the eyes of my royal father and the noble court, I would ask for your hand in marriage. I pledge myself to you, Mareena Titanos. Will you accept?”
My heart pounds as he speaks. Though his words sound like a question, I know I have no choice in my answer. No matter how much I want to look away, my eyes stay on Maven. He gives me the smallest of encouraging smiles. I wonder to myself which girl would’ve been chosen for him.
Who would I have chosen? If none of this had happened, if Kilorn’s master never died, if Gisa’s hand was never broken, if nothing ever changed. If. It’s the worst word in the world.
Conscription. Survival. Green-eyed children with my quick feet and Kilorn’s last name. That future was almost impossible before; now it’s nonexistent.
“I pledge myself to you, Maven Calore,” I say, hammering the last nails into my coffin. My voice quivers, but I don’t stop. “I accept.”
It carries such finality, slamming a door on the rest of my life. I feel like collapsing but somehow manage to sit back down gracefully.