Rəşad Savalanlı
@reshadsvln
Şu anda okuduğu kitaplar
Rəşad Savalanlı
, bir kitap okudu10/10
Beğendi
·11 günde okudu
·Okunma: 20 Haziran 2025 20:43
·2025 7. kitabı
"Not unforgivable," replied Breuer. "You yourself taught me that we are each composed of many parts, each clamoring for expression. We can be held responsible only for the final compromise, not for the wayward impulses of each of the parts. Your so-called selfishness is forgivable precisely because you care enough about me to share it with me now. My parting wish for you, my dear friend, is that the word 'unforgivable' be banished from your lexicon."
Yet over and over I am haunted by one fear" He hesitated for a moment, then plunged ahead. "Despite my bravado about being the posthumous philosopher, despite my certitude that my day will come, despite even my knowledge of eternal return-I am haunted by the thought of dying alone. Do you know what it's like to know that when you die, your body may not be discovered for days or weeks, not until the aroma beckons some stranger? I try to soothe myself. Often, in my deepest isolation, I speak to myself. Yet not too loudly, for I fear my own hollow echo. The one, the only one, who filled this hollowness was Lou Salomé."
"Oh, I have my pretenses, Josef, my secret ways of tolerating aloneness, even glorifying it. I say that I must be separate from others to think my own thoughts. I say that the great minds of the past are my companions, that they crawl out of their hiding places into my sunshine. I scoff at the fear of solitude. I profess that great men must undergo great pain, that I have flown too far into the future, and that none can accompany me. I crow that if I am misunderstood or feared or rejected, then so much the better it means I am on target! I say that my courage in facing aloneness without the herd, without the illusion of a divine provider, is proof of my greatness.
"I meant only that, to fully relate to another, one must first relate to oneself. If we cannot embrace our own aloneness, we will simply use the other as a shield against isolation. Only when one can live like the eagle-with no audience whatsoever-can one turn to another in love; only then is one able to care about the enlargement of the other's being. Ergo, if one is unable to give up a marriage, then the marriage is doomed."