m
@vemer
ne yaparsam yapayım, anladığın kadarım
Şu anda okuduğu kitap
Kindness is always the first choice. But there are times when you can’t be kind to someone who doesn’t have your best interests in mind. When you see this behavior, it’s appropriate to be kind to yourself by responding to it, either by correcting the situation or by not allowing the person to have access to you.
Bu yaz yanınızdan ayırmak istemeyeceğiniz kitapları sizin için bir araya getirdik.
💬 Siz olsanız bu listeden hangisiyle başlardınız?
Don’t take it personally. Very little has anything to do with you. Many people lack the basic equipment to be in a relationship and there’s nothing you can do to change it. You can’t take a skunk and dip it in perfume and hope it becomes a puppy. Eventually, the perfume will wear off and you’ll still have a skunk on your hands.
If a relationship is on-and-off within the first year, that’s an immediate sign you are wasting your time. He’s not “hot and cold” because he’s indecisive. He’s “hot and cold” because he is manipulating you.
Once a woman realizes a man is going into “couch potato” mode, she often mistakenly tries to address it. “You never take me out or bring me flowers anymore.” Or, “We never spend time together.” This is a sign to a man that he has her right where he wants her. Now he doesn’t participate because, in his mind, all it takes to satisfy her is his presence. He quips, “I’m with you, aren’t I?”
To get the three-year-old to run back to Mommy, she has to stay just outside his reach. The reason nagging keeps her within his reach is that he senses she is “locked down” waiting for him. She may be waiting for him to give more, participate more, or be more attentive in some way. But she’s still waiting. On hold.
In the beginning, men are so willing to make an impression, and this is why they are especially accommodating. This is precisely when you’ll want to help him form good habits. Later, when everything has been done for him, he’ll be too set in his ways to change.