In high school, I’m the opposite. I’m too much myself, because the too muchness is a way of saying, I’m still here. The me of me, and not the me he wants me to be.
I thought for a few hours after I cried in the bathroom that I would call her and I would tell her I loved her. But I did not trust calling her. I was afraid that if I called her, she would talk and it would be too hard for me to love her after that.