Alara
@paperthin
“For I have known them all already, known them all—
Have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons,
I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.”
Grandpa laughs, Noah too. They always give each other unnecessary presents. Grandpa gave Noah a plastic bag full of air for Christmas and Noah gave Grandpa a sandal. For his birthday, Noah gave Grandpa a piece of chocolate he’d already eaten. That was Grandpa’s favorite.
“We had too little time,” he says.
She shakes her head. “We had an eternity. Children and grandchildren.”
“I only had you for the blink of an eye,” he says.
She laughs. “You had me an entire lifetime. All of mine.”
“That wasn’t enough.”
She kisses his wrist; her chin rests in his fingers. “No.”
Humans are a strange breed in the way our fear of getting old seems to be even greater than our fear of dying.
“ … at the very base, immovable black melancholy.… I no longer see any point at all to living even another half year, everything is full, painful, dégoutant. I forgo and suffer too much. … I shall do nothing good anymore, so why do anything! ”
