Willy Wonka
@willywonka
oompa loompa muhabbeti sarmadı
32 okur puanı
Ocak 2017 tarihinde katıldı
Şu anda okuduğu kitaplar
The research literature has identified three factors that universally lead to stress: uncertainty, the lack of information and the loss of control.8 All three are present in the lives of individuals with chronic illness. Many people may have the illusion that they are in control, only to find later that forces unknown to them were driving their decisions and behaviours for many, many years. I have found that in my life. For some people, it is disease that finally shatters the illusion of control.
“Kötü bir anıyı unutmanın en iyi yolu güzel bir tanesiyle değişmektir.”
What do all stressors have in common? Ultimately they all represent the absence of something that the organism perceives as necessary for survival—or its threatened loss.
Medical thinking usually sees stress as highly disturbing but isolated events such as, for example, sudden unemployment, a marriage breakup or the death of a loved one. These major events are potent sources of stress for many, but there are chronic daily stresses in people’s lives that are more insidious and more harmful in their long-term biological consequences. Internally generated stresses take their toll without in any way seeming out of the ordinary.
For those habituated to high levels of internal stress since early childhood, it is the absence of stress that creates unease, evoking boredom and a sense of meaninglessness. People may become addicted to their own stress hormones, adrenaline and cortisol, Hans Selye observed. To such persons stress feels desirable, while the absence of it feels like something to be avoided.
Jackie’s relationship with her mother became one of symbiotic dependence from which neither party could free herself. The child was neither allowed to be a child nor permitted to grow up to be an adult.
Véronique identifies with her adoptive father. “He’s my hero,” she says. “He was always there for me.”
“So why didn’t you go to him for help when you felt pressured by your mother?”
“I could never get him alone. I always had to go through her to get to him.”
“And what did your father do with all this?”
“He just stood by. But I could tell he didn’t like it.”
“I’m glad you feel close to your dad. But you may wish to find yourself a new hero—one who can model some self-assertion. In order to heal, you may wish to become your own hero.”