Make sure he doen't kill himself
So despite the tiredness dripping down my bones like tar, I stride out of
the room with renewed determination. I can’t stop. I won’t. I will keep
going. I will keep trying. Because I will tear a rip through this fucking
world so I can get to her…
Or die trying.
Every time I hear flapping wings, I half expect Argo to burst through the
trees and land in front of me. But he’s probably still on a ship somewhere in
the fucking ocean, and I don’t know what any animal mender will be able to
do for him.
Yet another thing out of my control.
I’ve tried to pour out power here every day since I got back, and still,
nothing. Rot boils in my veins, fueled by my rage, but the well of raw
power stays empty.
It just makes me even more infuriated.
I feel exhaustion tugging at me as incessantly as the wrongness of my
separation from her. But I stay fastened to the base of this mountain, failing
over and over again. Because failing is better than giving up. Failing means
I’m still trying.
At least there’s no one around to see it—to see this pathetic attempt to
stop failing. No one else comes here. The timberwings won’t allow it—not
even their preferred handlers or riders. The beasts are far too territorial over
this feed site to tolerate anyone else. The only exception, apparently, is me.
Which is why it’s really fucking stupid when I hear a timberwing land
behind me, and then my brother calls out, “You need to rest.”
I sigh, dropping my hands down to my sides. “You shouldn’t be here.”
The female timberwing past the boulders lets off a guttural warning
growl that vibrates through the air. My brother’s beast lets out a responding
one, both equally bristled. At least Ryatt has the good sense not to
dismount. He doesn’t, however, have the good sense not to irritate me.
“Judging by the
Home?
Ryatt lowers his arms and brings the cloak down again but doesn’t
bother to put it back on.
Now encased in the shadows of the cave, it would be completely
pitch-black if it weren’t for the soft blue glow that comes from the
fluorescent veins that run through the belly of the mountain. These cerulean
streaks branch off in every direction, running through the walls, floor, and
ceiling, while colorless beetles cling to their surface to nibble on their
sediment. Stalactites reach down from the ceiling, pointing at us in
accusation.
“So? You going to tell me what you’re doing here?” I ask as we walk,
my voice echoing bleakly.
“Did you really think I wasn’t going to come?” Ryatt’s hands clench
around his cloak in bitter twists. “I wanted to come here the moment Midas
issued his threats, and you know it, so you can just save your fucking
commands,” he snaps, jaw locked tight.
I feel my own teeth grind in response. I probably have no right to be
frustrated with him, because I understand his anger, and yet, I am. As he
often is with me.
“Fine,” I relent. I’m too cold and exhausted to argue. “We’ll talk more
tomorrow. But I need to get her warm and dry.”
He glances at Auren from the corner of his eyes. “Fucking storm had
to hit tonight of all nights.”
My brother and I walk in tense silence through the cave. Without
even trying, our strides match, our shoulders at the same height, our clothes
nearly identical. When my fae nature isn’t out, we could pass for twins, a
fact that I’ve used to my advantage many, many times.
Despite the fact that we always effortlessly fall into stride with one
another, we always seem to step on each other’s toes.
I would die for Ryatt, and he’s given up a lot to be at my side, but
most days, we’d gladly pummel each other.
Reklam
I thik this is the start of a friendship
A dripping spoon moves up and down the length of me. “You know,
more metallic. Reflective. Cold. But you’re all flesh and warmth, aren’t
you? All womanly curves and soft flesh, but just…” He tips his head as if
searching for the right word. “Gilded.”
My cheeks are hot beneath the shadow of my hood, and I shift on my
feet, undecided if I should spin around and walk away or if it’s worth it to
stay so that I can eat. Though, I realize that his words weren’t spoken with
any cruelty or lewdness, just with pure surprise instead.
“That’s why she’s called the gilded pet, you idiot,” one of the soldiers
gripes behind me, making me tense. “Now can you stop yapping and serve
us? We’re hungry, and your slop doesn’t get any better when it’s cold.”
Keg’s attention shifts over my head, and he points his spoon again,
making a particularly lumpy bit fall to the ground an inch away from my
skirts. “You can fuck off and wait in line, or I’ll dump this here slop on the
ground and then plant my foot up your arse, how about that, soldier?”
I can’t help it. I smile.
Keg sees, his smug eyes moving back to me, same as his still
outstretched spoon. “See? The gilded one gets me. That means she gets to
be served before the rest of you ungrateful lot.”
The men in line groan, but my smile drops off my face, and I shake
my head adamantly. “Oh, no. No, that’s okay. I’ll wait,” I insist. The last
thing I need is the men behind me taking offense and making me pay for it.
“What the fuck, Keg? She’s a Divine-damned prisoner!” One of them
directly behind me growls, which only proves that this is a bad idea.
Keg doesn’t look nearly as worried as I do. “Yeah, well, I like her
more than I like your annoying ass voice right now, and seeing as how I’m
the cook here, I decide who gets served. So you can take
“I… Yeah.” He scrubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “I’ve been thinking about this. The more I think, the more I realize I want a life with her. Us, to have a life with her. That thing is just another obstacle to that.”
“We all want that, Rafe,” Arsen agreed.
“Thinking of not having kids with her… It sort of made me snap.”
“She’s right, though. This isn’t exactly the best place for her to be pregnant,” I pointed out.
“There are midwives here,” he replied.
“And if she needs more?” Arsen asked. “If we’re attacked while she’s round and barely mobile?”
“Then we’ll say fuck the mission, give the money back to the shit stains who hired us, and take her home. We’ll find a new home, or take one if we have to. I’m not giving her up. I want kids. With her. If that means we’re done with this life, then so be it.”
We sat in stunned silence, Rafe was speechless at the words that he’d spoken, as we were. Hope took a stranglehold on my heart. It wasn’t something we’d been looking for, but when Colby had come into our lives so had all these feelings. “I want that, too,” I admitted.
We had never considered leaving this life, prior to Colby. I’d never thought of retirement or anything in the future really. Just finish the mission and get on another. Now, all of this, without her, just felt empty.
“Same,” Arsen said with a sigh.
"You like Tokyo?"
"One place or another-it's all the same to me."
"I guess so. I haven't left this town since the Tokyo Olympics."
"You like it here?"
"As you said. It's all the same."
"Yeah."
Sayfa 143 - MURAKAMI-WIND
