Last Words
George CarlinLast Words Sözleri ve Alıntıları
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“It’s called the American Dream because to believe it, you have to be ASLEEP!”
i am gonna steal this
“Gee, he was here a moment ago …”
—(What George wanted on his tombstone—if he’d had one.)
Laughter, like politics, is always local.
Bütün işi tırtıl yapar; ama şöhreti kelebek kapar- George Carlin
I support a woman’s right to an abortion. So long as it’s not my abortion.
Circumcision: a barbaric practice designed to remind you as early as possible that your genitals are not your own.
Only pinheaded criminal business pricks and politicians wrote autobiographies.
The Irish do enjoy sex—at least the last ten seconds or so. But we must admit that Irish foreplay consists of little more than “You awake?” Or the more caring, sensitive “Brace yourself, Agnes!”
He was also doing a new humor book, When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?, a title designed to be offensive to all three Abrahamic faiths. (When it came out in 2004, the only religious institution it offended was Walmart. Because the cover lampooned the Last Supper with George seated at the table, waiting for Jesus, they refused to rack the book.)
For the first four weeks of my life I lived to projectile vomit. My mother later told me with great pride: “They would feed you and you would shoot formula clear across the room. You couldn’t keep anything down.” And I still can’t. This remarkable inability to hold anything back and to spew it clear across a public space has served me well my whole life.