Çocuğundan arda kalan Benim. Eski bir bebeklik resmimi buldum. Resimdeki ben değilim, bir başkası O. Pembe, şişman, henüz hastalık,yalnızlık nedir bilmeyen,
ağladığı zaman doyurulan, uzanan, kucağa alınan ve tekmeleyen fakat kimsenin canını yakmayan ve dilediği zaman gözlerini kapar kapamaz uyuyabilen biri O.
Öylece yatıp başının üstünde
sufi
Mevlana Jalaluddin Rumi says...
The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you, don't go back to sleep!
You must ask for what you really want, don't go back to sleep!
People are going back and forth across the doorsill, the door is round and open,
don't go back to sleep!
I would love to kiss you, the price of kissing is your life.
Now, my loving is
The Appointment in Samarra
(as retold by W Somerset Maugham [1933])
"The speaker is Death
There was a merchant in Bagdad who sent his servant to market to buy provisions and in a little while the servant came back, white and trembling, and said, Master, just now when I was in the marketplace I was jostled by a woman in the crowd and when I turned I saw it was Death that jostled me. She looked at me and made a threatening gesture, now, lend me your horse, and I will ride away from this city and avoid my fate. I will go to Samarra and there Death will not find me. The merchant lent him his horse, and the servant mounted it, and he dug his spurs in its flanks and as fast as the horse could gallop he went. Then the merchant went down to the marketplace and he saw me standing in the crowd and he came to me and said, why did you make a threatening gesture to my servant when you saw him this morning? That was not a threatening gesture, I said, it was only a start of surprise. I was astonished to see him in Bagdad, for I had an appointment with him tonight in Samarra."
Close your eyes and lose the feeling that's been sinking
Close your eyes and count to three
Close your eyes rewind, I know just what you're thinking
Close your eyes and think of me.
His Bad Side
I was such a fool..
I almost falling in love. All this time, he wanted her&her.. But he said it was me,that she. We believed together and he said he liked a girl who is like a friend to him. I thought this part was a just a dream. But its hard to tell everything actually. He spent all his time with her and everyone told me i was wrong but i underestimated him.
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Then i felt somethings.I thought that will be twice if i fell in love this year,i still cant understand me but i love somethings like: the wind, pink colour,cherries,being mad all the time for someone... But i dont know that i love somebody. Just exhausting.
But i shouldnt forget for the next time anymore, boys like girls who similar to her and not like me. I was know this rule once in the past but i think i forgot it.
I clearly see everything. I want to explain all my feelings but now, im trying to digest..
He played with all of us and i thought i played with him. He pretends like a lover and i wont believe next time,for anyone.
I was such a fool for believing that you...i said it.