Good evening, London. I thought it time we had a little talk. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin… I suppose you're wondering why I called you here this evening. Well, you see, I'm not entirely satisfied with your performance lately... I'm afraid your work's been slipping, and... And I'm afraid we've been thinking about letting you go.
Oh, I know, I know. You've been with the company a long time now. Almost... Let me see. Almost ten thousand years! My word, doesn't time fly? It seems like only yesterday... I remember the day you commenced your employment, swinging down from the trees, fresh-faced and nervous, a bone clasped in your bristling fist...
"Where do I start, sir?" You asked, plaintively. I recall my exact words: "There's a pile of dinosaur eggs over there, youngster," I said, smiling paternally the while. "Get sucking." Well, we've certainly come a long way since then, haven't we? And yes, yes, you're right, in all that time you haven't missed a day. Well done, thou good and faithful servant.
Also, please don't think I've forgotten about your outstanding service record, or about all the invaluable contributions you've made to the company... Fire, the wheel, agriculture... It's an impressive list, old-timer. A jolly impressive list. Don't get me wrong. But... Well, to be frank, we've had our problems, too. There's no getting away from it.
Do you know what I think a lot of it stems from? I'll tell you... It's your basic unwillingness to get on with the company. You don't seem to want to face up to any real responsibility, or to be your own boss. Lord knows, you've been given plenty of opportunities...
We've offered you promotion time and time again, and each time you've turned us down. "I couldn't handle the work, guv'nor," you wheedled. "I know