I am obsessed with a boy that I met 3 years ago. We were met in a office and I was an intern. He was very different than others with her attitude and style. He behaves like he doesn’t care anything at all. He was very quiet and you can understand easily that he is just interesting on his own way. When our first chat he was staring at me like I am a food and he is starving. At first I was confused. I just couldn’t understand why he is looking like that. I felt important with his glance. When I enter his room he always stopped, cut his speech and staring at me. Sometimes I feel very ashamed. I thought that everybody looking at to caught us.
After a couple days with our exchange glances his eyes came to visit me in my dreams. I just couldn’t stop thinking of him. Working hours are became the best time for me. But i was very shy. I was trying to talk with him once. We were talking on our work area and I said bunch of stupid things. I just can’t thinking when he is staring at me. I was felling apart.
After a couple weeks it is time to say goodbye to me. My internship period is completed. When my very last day I shake everybody’s hand to say goodbye. But that boy just came and hugged me. It was so unexpected.
I met a girl in that office and she wanted to meet me. I said OK because I know that she is very close to that boy. The boy who I am in love with.
I met the girl in a small cafe. Her phone rang when we were talking. I saw his name on the screen of the phone. He said that he is hanging with his friends and wanted to meet with us. I just don’t wanted to go. I want to talk with him and spend my years to understand him but just with him. I don’t want the others. Because of that I said no and we didn’t meet that day.
When our second meeting with the girl he phoned again. I was ready this time. I said that he can come to a bar which we were deciced to go. He said he will come but he never showed. I was very angry and disappointed. The girl invited a stranger boy to hang with us.
I wanted to forget him and everything so I drink. The stranger boy was interested in me. We had a small chat. He hugged me after a couple glass of wine. We were drunk and we danced. I remember her face when I was dancing with that boy. She was just hate me. Their plan went down to plughole.
After that I saw him few times at my university. I saw him with a girl once they were just walking. He was not staring at me like he did before. He was very stabile.
During 3 years and after that night with other boy i was trying to reach him on every social media platform. I sent an email to him to asked his opinion about my future career and invite him to drink a cup of coffee. He sent me a disgusting answer. It was very rude. He was trying to hurt me. I never answered and we never communicate with each other again. I added him on instagram once and trying to him a second message but he blocked me.
That blocked was not just a blocked. He blocage every possibilities of us. I hurt his feelings. From now one this is a war for him.
I know this is very stupid but i am still thinking about him. I learned from linkedin that he has his own office right now.
tl;dr What I am going to now? Do I chase my dreams and trust my instincts? I just can’t stop thinking about him and I feel like I have to say sorry to him from his face. Or Do I have to forget him and other things which we didn’t share and had been just dreamed