Ethan, broken, Juliet, Casie
Dear Cassie,
I’ve been wanting to give this to you for ages, and after the incredible gift you gave me last
night, I figured the time felt right. I found it in a little antique shop in Milano while I was
touring Europe. I don’t know why it caught my eye, but I had to buy it for you.
The thing is, it’s not perfect. It’s had a lot of owners,
Unlike other early sociological thinkers, Weber argued that sociology should focus on social action, not social structures. He argued that human motivation and ideas were the forces behind change -ideas, values and beliefs had the power to bring about transformations. According to Weber, individuals have the ability to act freely and to shape the future. He did not see, as did Durkheim and Marx, that structures existed external to or independent of individuals. Rather, structures in society were formed by a complex interplay of actions. It was the job of sociology to understand the meanings behind those actions.
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In turn, much of human motivation comes from living through a story of our lives, a story that we tell to ourselves and that creates a framework for motivation. Life could be just “one damn thing after another” if it weren’t for such stories.
If you need motivation to do something,
then don't do it.
- E. M.
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Hedef kitlede istenilen etkinin yaratılabilmesi, ya da var olan tepkilerin istenildiği gibi yönlendirilmesi, sanıldığından öte, çok karmaşık süreçlerin, doğru çözümlenmesine ve motivation tekniklerinin bilinçli biçimde uygulanmasına bağlıdır.
Sayfa 1
Whatever your problems are, the concept is the same: solve problems; be happy. Unfortunately, for many people, life doesn’t feel that simple. That’s because they fuck things up in at least one of two ways:
1. Denial. Some people deny that their problems exist in the first place. And because they deny reality, they must constantly delude or distract themselves from reality. This may make them feel good in the short term, but it leads to a life of insecurity, neuroticism, and emotional repression.
2. Victim Mentality. Some choose to believe that there is nothing they can do to solve their problems, even when they in fact could. Victims seek to blame others for their problems or blame outside circumstances. This may make them feel better in the short term, but it leads to a life of anger, helplessness, and despair.
People deny and blame others for their problems for the simple reason that it’s easy and feels good, while solving problems is hard and often feels bad. Forms of blame and denial give us a quick high. They are a way to temporarily escape our problems, and that escape can provide us a quick rush that makes us feel better. (...) In this sense, almost anything can become addictive, depending on the motivation behind using it.
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Action isn’t just the effect of motivation; it’s also the cause of it.
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If you lack the motivation to make an important change in your life, do something—anything, really—and then harness the reaction to that action as a way to begin motivating yourself.
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Ruminating on our problems and feelings scratches at our emotional scabs and causes four primary psychological wounds: it intensifies our sadness and allows it to persist for far longer than it might have otherwise; likewise, it intensifies and prolongs our anger; it hogs substantial amounts of emotional and intellectual resources, inhibiting motivation, initiative, and our ability to focus and think productively; and our need to discuss the same events or feelings repeatedly for weeks, months, and sometimes years on end taxes the patience and compassion of our social support systems and puts our relationships at risk.
