“Perhaps I am not who I consider myself to be. Perhaps, in truth, I have never really considered myself at all.”
Sayfa 19 - FaberKitabı okudu
"Perhaps, one day, you may want to come back. I shall wait for that day. I want to stand up in your tears, and splash about in them, and sing. I want to be there when you grovel. I want to be there, I want to watch it, I want the front seat. I want to see your face rubbed in the mud - that's all I can hope for. There's nothing else I want any longer."
e-kitap olarak okuyorum.Kitabı okuyor
Perhaps it is bad French; French may not contain the words that express the speaker's thoughts; nevertheless speaking French imposes some order, some uniformity.
Sayfa 101
Quora
Postmodernism is an intellectual dead end; it’s central premise seems to be derived from a saying of Nietzsche’s, “There are no facts; only interpretations”, which is thought to mean that each one of us views “reality” through our individual perspective. This is true to a degree, but as with so many aphorisms, there are limits to its validity;
If from great Nature’s or our own abyss
Of thought we could but snatch a certainty,
Perhaps mankind might find the path they miss,
But then ’twould spoil much good philosophy.
"Perhaps he said to her: 'I long for you when you are with me, as if you were far away.' And perhaps she said to him: 'I embrace you when you are far away, as if you were my breasts.' Perhaps he said to her: 'I melt at your glances and become music.' And perhaps she said to him: 'Your hand on my knee makes time sweat, so rub me so that I melt away.'"
Sayfa 56 - archipelago books, journal, translated from the Arabic by Catherine CobhamKitabı okuyor
''Hope was a dangerous, disquieting thing, but he thought
perhaps he liked it.''
“None of this can actually be happening. If it makes you more comfortable, you could simply think of it as metaphor. Religions are, by definition, metaphors, after all: God is a dream a hope, a woman, an ironist, a father, a city, a house of many rooms, a watchmaker who left his prize chronometer in the desert, someone who loves you — even, perhaps, against all evidence, a celestial being whose only interest is to make sure your football team, army, business, or marriage thrives, prospers, and triumphs over all opposition.
Religions are places to stand and look and act, vantage points from which to view the world.”
02
a survival of a hugely remote period when... consciousness was manifested, perhaps, in shapes and forms...
"We had given AM sentience. Inadvertently, of course, but sentience nonetheless. But it had been trapped. AM wasn't God, he was a machine. We had created him to think, but there was nothing it could do with that creativity. In rage, in frenzy, the machine had killed the human race, almost all of us, and still it was trapped. AM could not wander, AM could not wonder, AM could not belong. He could merely be. And so, with the innate loathing that all machines had always held for the weak, soft creatures who had built them, he had sought revenge. And in his paranoia, he had decided to reprieve five of us, for a personal, everlasting punishment that would never serve to diminish his hatred… that would merely keep him reminded, amused, proficient at hating man. Immortal, trapped, subject to any torment he could devise for us from the limitless miracles at his command. He would never let us go. We were his belly slaves. We were all he had to do with his forever time. We would be forever with him, with the cavern-filling bulk of the creature machine, with the all-mind soulless world he had become. He was Earth, and we were the fruit of that Earth; and though he had eaten us, he would never digest us. We could not die. We had tried it. We had attempted suicide, oh one or two of us had. But AM had stopped us. I suppose we had wanted to be stopped. Don't ask why. I never did. More than a million times a day. Perhaps once we might be able to sneak a death past him. Immortal, yes, but not indestructible."
I Have No Mouth & I Must ScreamKitabı okudu
Eşcinsel erkekler ve çocukluk çağı cinsel istismar ilişkisi hakkında
"The author was explicit in refuting that childhood sexual abuse is not the causality of gender nonconformation, but rather, gender nonconforming (GNC) behaviors may be risk factors for childhood sexual abuse (CSA). (...)
An Imprinted Arousal Pattern (IAP), which is common among individuals with a history of CSA, can be defined as a phenomenon where an individual in adulthood may continue to seek out heightened states of arousal (not necessarily sexual arousal) and circumstances that blatantly or implicitly resemble circumstances of the abuse. This type of behavior is learned, and is imprinted as a result of the traumatic effect of CSA. These behaviors or efforts to reconcile their trauma are repeated in a maladaptive, ego-dystonic pattern, which are ultimately frantic attempts to heal from their trauma. Behaviors of IAPs are of particular concern as they have the potential to lead to high-risk sexual behaviors as well, such as unsafe cruising for sex, sex while inebriated in efforts to perhaps dissociate and detach from the experience, or other dangerous sexual situations. It is believed that the individual may still be in an unconsciously heightened emotional state of arousal associated with the traumatic experience. This may cause the individual to feel out of control of their state of arousal and emotions, similar to their experience of being sexually abused as a child. However, as adults, gay men with a history of CSA may try to control their affect in efforts to not feel victimized by their trauma anymore (Cassese, 2000)."
Khouraki, A. (2020). The Effects of Childhood Sexual Abuse on the Self-Identified Gay Male (Doctoral dissertation, Pepperdine University).
Ode to nightingale
My heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains
My sense, as though of hemlock I had drunk,
Or emptied some dull opiate to the drains
One minute past, and Lethe-wards had sunk:
'Tis not through envy of thy happy lot,
But being too happy in thine happiness,—
That thou, light-winged Dryad of the trees
When Juan answered, ‘Spanish, ’ he replied,
‘I thought in fact you could not be a Greek;
Those servile dogs are not so proudly eyed.
Fortune has played you here a pretty freak,
But that’s her way with all men till they’re tried;
But never mind, she’ll turn, perhaps, next week.
Two children he had had, and he had not seen either clearly. But perhaps no parent can truly see their child. When we look we see only the mirror of our own faults.
CirceKitabı okudu
“Religions are, by definition, metaphors, after all: God is a dream, a hope, a woman, an ironist, a father, a city, a house of many rooms, a watchmaker who left his prize chronometer in the desert, someone who loves you - even, perhaps, against all evidence, a celestial being whose only interest is to make sure your football team, army, business, or marriage thrives, prospers, and triumphs over all opposition.”